I mentioned earlier that I had been doing a series of workshops, primarily on money personalities, and I have been amazed at the number of peo
ple who come up to me later to say they recognize themselves in some of the personalities mentioned.
What I realized is that the economy has finally forced us all to look at our relationship with money, but most people are not clear on where to begin once they are ready to take that look. Money is one of those subjects that we either take for granted (“Everyone understands money don’t they?”); or we feel overwhelmed and just don’t want to talk about it (I just can’t seem to get a handle on my finances!”).
Few of us realize that money is loaded with emotional connections that shape not only our finances but also how we tend to see the world. That it is not just a matter of spending less, but understanding why we spend and what is the emotional script we are following that drives our actions. 
We are constantly told if we buy this toothpaste or a certain car that our friends will admire and/or envy us, and we constantly chase this mirage. But just like if we were suffering in the desert and see a mirage of a cool oasis we buy these products and yet still feel somehow thirsty for something more. So really the question we should be asking ourselves is: “But will it make you happy?!”
This constant search for the next big thing and our relationship with money is tied to interpretations we have made a long time ago and silent promises we have made to ourselves without realizing it. We may gain the upper hand in terms of our finances for awhile but those silent promises never go away and we once again find ourselves honoring them and out of control.
And so I begin this series on money personality with a goal of helping you acknowledge your silent promises and understand how to bring those promises into balance in a way that allows you to be you, and answer the question I originally posed: “”But will it make you happy?!”
Well, I can speak from experience.. I’ve always known that money doesn’t bring happiness… Its a quick fix to make one happy for the moment but in the long run? NO… The person I was involved w/thought money was the answer.. Its unfortunate he was ignorant in how to use it… Impulse buyer- need I say more? He made mistake after mistake and thought that I would help him out..Y would I? he assumed because I had the means.. U can imagine the look I gave back… I am sooooo glad I am no longer involved…
Chrissy,
And that is what this blog series is all about: Those who feel out of control and want to change but have difficulty controlling and/or understanding why they do what they do. Future posts will explore the different money personalities and how that can cause conflict in relationships (which sounds like the case with your friend). The goal is to, in a nonjudgmental manner, explore what has caused their money behavior to become so unbalanced (what silent promises are they trying to fulfill) and then provide ways that they can satisfy those promises without feeling out of control and financially unbalanced.
I know w/my ex bf, he has very low self esteem. Plus having drinking issues, he gets instant satisfaction from buying things he thinks he needs… His problem is that he realizes after the fact that he shouldn’t have thrown his money away… He doesn’t think of the consequences…just fills that void.